A few years ago, I attended my friend Nick’s 40th birthday blowout.

As part of the celebration, he took an improv comic, and we all must participate in the study of improv comedy.

(I just felt the collective shudder of all the introverts reading this newsletter).

We started coming up with fun scenarios and scenes to act out, and we learned about the most important rule of Improv: “Yes and.”

Two simple words, and the foundation for all improv comedy:

Whenever a scene, sentence, or situation comes to mind, the ONLY acceptable response is: “yes and”

• Yes: Acceptance! I accept and acknowledge that any situation, no matter how crazy, is real.
• And: build! Just like a tennis match, after your improv partner hits the ball to you, it’s your job to return it! Building the situation or scene.

For example, if your improv partner says, “I’m a space pirate” your response might be:

• “Yes, and I’m the space police, you’re under arrest!”
• “Yes, and I’m the first mate looking for a new crew, it’s perfect!”
• “Yes, and my name is Captain Hook, welcome to Pirates Anonymous.”

The “yes and” rule is so important, because there’s nothing worse than a bad improv partner!

Like Liam Neeson Thethis short sketchThe with Ricky Gervais, (every time I laugh):

The Yes And Rules for Life

As a former overachieving “gifted child” with a somewhat negative inner critic, I’ve worked hard to incorporate “yes and” into my life.

The “yes” part is built around acceptance, which is something I’ve spent the last two years working to embrace.

See my previous essays on TheAcceptanceThe and TheWabi SaysThe for more.

It’s the “and” part that I’ve been focusing on lately.

As Dr. Kristen Neff points out in her book TheSelf pityThelife is complicated and so are people:

“Judgment defines people as bad versus good and tries to capture their essential nature through simple labels.

Discriminating wisdom recognizes complexity and ambiguity.”

Nothing is as simple as it seems. Things are never as good or as bad as our brain thinks.

So despite the voice in our heads that wants to judge everything in black-or-white, yes-or-no, good-or-bad terms… We must remember that life is a beautiful and complex mess.

Author F. Scott Fitzgerald once said:

The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two conflicting ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.

One must, for example, see that things are hopeless and still be determined to do them otherwise.

This is my task for you today.

Is there an area of ​​your life that seems black-or-white, and could use a little complexity instead?

Nothing is as simple as it seems.

Life is hard, and change is hard. AND you are a good person who works hard.

It means there is hope. And Thehope is the warrior emotionThe.

Also, please watch it TheLiam Neeson skitThe.

Up to you.

-Steve

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